My personal motto?  I have several. First:  What would Alexis Morell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan do?  Because really, she was so freaking awesome and she pwned EVERYONE in Denver.  And it's somewhat helpful.  The only problem is that Alexis would've slapped the shit out of everybody or thrown a martini in their face.  So it really doesn't actually work, but it is helpful when you need to get your bitch on.

The other "motto" I live by is the 4 rules to becoming a drag queen from To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar.  Which are as follows:
1. Let positive thoughts be your sword and shield
2. Ignore adversity
3. Abide by the rules of love
4. Larger than life is just the right size.

In other news, I got my haircut last night, FINALLY.  Went to dinner with Brian and then Starbucks where I was stupid and ordered a tall drip instead of a tall decaf drip.  So I had a LOT of energy for about 2 hours.  And then boom - it was gone.

Today, went to Wal-Mart.  Saved $10 in coupons and then cleaned the hell out of my apartment for 2 hours.  Easy with the help of Lady Gaga, Kylie Minogue and Britney Spears.  Very easy.  And tonight, Reese and I are gonna watch foreign films and order a pizza and maybe hit up the Macy*s one-day sale. Good times.

• 06:00 Omg. I forgot how much waking up at 4 am kind of sucks. At least it's just one day of work. #
• 07:29 Only 184 emails in my inbox this morning. Not bad. #
• 18:03 @tansahsa yep 4am. I get up catch the bus at 530 get to work at 645 just in time to clock in at 7. #
• 18:04 watching Big Bang Theory and being bad moody. You ever just get in a really shitty mood for no reason? That's me now. #

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• 20:30 I always forget how much i love hockey. #
• 20:30 Watching hockey live is so much better than on tv. #
• 21:06 This game is awesome and so is the lady behind us. I love having plans on new years. #
• 21:19 Yay. The stars are ahead and there are like 8 bottles of champagne in my fridge! #
• 21:21 On top of all that i'm skinny. #
• 21:29 It's not luck. It's genetics and buns of steel videos. Lol. #

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• 23:03 @1416andcounting yes for serious. #
• 23:04 And she's gone to the mental hospital. For awhile. #
• 19:48 At the stars game. Fun! #

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• 20:18 @sallamandersam she wants my dad to hit her. I'm thinking she's like TOTALLY BATSHIT INSANE #
• 20:18 @tansahsa Wednesday morning. One more full day. #
• 23:11 Ah. there is peace again. took me going off on her - but peace at last #
• 00:57 and I'm done with this. posting the bullshit on facebook? so not on. #
• 12:40 Oh shit. Bitchfest 2009 is starting early: my sister saw the facebook comments about her. #
• 12:41 @THEJenlo Believe me - that's the only thing keeping me going... #
• 12:41 @1416andcounting no, worse: she posted shitty stuff about my sister. #
• 13:31 @THEJenlo so much word to this. #
• 14:01 @1416andcounting I know - that's why my sister is completely ready to fly here and kick the bitch's ass. #
• 14:01 @1416andcounting Also - my dad is LIVID. #
• 14:55 @1416andcounting Like, he might just divorce her. It wasn't mean - just shitty #
• 15:20 @sallamandersam muffins are win. #
• 15:20 She deleted everything - good thing I took screenprints. Thanks, fandom_wank for teaching me that. #
• 15:35 @queenthesixth no - she doesn't want to upset dad. he's planning on dealing with it AFTER I leave - because I would just escalate it. #
• 15:35 @sallamandersam I have no idea - other than the fact that she's totally insane. #
• 17:04 it would appear as though someone is going to be committed to a mental hospital. #
• 17:26 @sallamandersam yeah her sister is on her way to take her there. hopefully it does some good; suicide watch supposedly #
• 17:28 @sallamandersam I know. I had hoped that tonight would be drama-free but it appears the hospital thing is happening tonight #
• 18:06 YES! IMO'S PIZZA! #

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• 21:26 settling down to watch a movie I don't want to watch with people I don't want to be with. #
• 23:11 @1416andcounting I know, she totally sucks. She made us watch Road to Perdition because I apparently like violent mob movies. #
• 23:11 @tansahsa Yes and a healthy supply of TaB. #
• 12:19 I just woke up and all is quiet - because my hosts are all still asleep. #
• 12:37 Ok the Bonnie Hunt show is actually kind of funny. Later I will make my brother watch one life to live #
• 13:32 Sabrina the teenage witch is on right now and it's the episode where Sabrina runs into Harvey on Spring Break. #
• 14:25 @THEJenlo it's the 1 where Sabs,Morgan,Roxy head to the beach and the aunts cast a spell to turn it into Beach Blanket Bingo #
• 14:26 @sallamandersam I have softened my stance on Uggs in recent years. But yeah, that's not appropriate. #
• 14:27 Yay for L&O with Angie Harmon. She is awesome. Bless you TNT. #
• 17:58 @tansahsa She was my favorite ADA; but my all-time fave was Helen Gamble on "the Practice" #
• 17:58 Mmm...dinner is almost ready and I have done nothing all day. Delightful. #
• 17:59 @sallamandersam I'm sure. Running shorts belong in the gym or on someone running... #
• 18:38 and we're back to awkward silence and general bitchery. At least Project Runway is on #
• 18:53 OMG. I just found out my stylist doesn't work for Zen salon anymore. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? #
• 19:12 the drama just escalated "I want you to hit me! HIT ME!" I am so done with this bitch. She's dead to me now. #
• 19:43 @1416andcounting she so did. I am thoroughly disgusted by her it's not even funny. #
• 19:54 my dad's dog smells like Feria hair dye. #
• 20:18 @sallamandersam she wants my dad to hit her. I'm thinking she's like TOTALLY BATSHIT INSANE #
• 20:18 @tansahsa Wednesday morning. One more full day. #

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• 20:57 @sallamandersam It's because we're totally awesome! #
• 20:58 Just finished watching Stepbrothers - the dumbest movie ever - but also the funniest. #
• 21:28 @xxsincerityxx you have a date? Good luck! Remember - tits and lips! And don't close your mouth. It's that easy access mouth men love. #
• 21:32 @xxsincerityxx that works - I will be living vicariously through you since I have nothing to do in the Lou. #
• 21:34 @xxsincerityxx LOL. It's only weird if you stop the convo with "omg I have to twitter this" #
• 21:37 @xxsincerityxx the funniest thing is that you would totally actually do that. #
• 21:40 @xxsincerityxx true. nothing worse than wondering why you didn't get a second date. #
• 21:57 boo. Sister Act 2 is over. I am le sad. #
• 22:23 And now we are watching WALL-E and dad's wife is explaining Hello Dolly to me. As if I hadn't seen it ever. #
• 23:21 thankfully, the adults have gone to bed. No more bullshit! For now! #
• 01:21 @1416andcounting I KNOW! She was explaining the plot. I'm all, "yeah, I know. I've seen it like 80 times and own the DVD" #
• 01:21 @xxsincerityxx Yay! Decent first date! #
• 01:23 And now the day is done and it's time for one last smoke and then bedtime! #
• 12:20 Yes! French toast and The Bitch has a migraine so she's out for today! #
• 12:29 @xxsincerityxx well you could go out again and see if something happens or put out next time #
• 12:30 why do I like this stupid show True Jackson VP so much? #
• 13:48 @1416andcounting just to piss her off I spent all night singing Hello Dolly! And I haven't spent much time in her presence today. Migraine! #
• 13:49 @cleolinda I don't either, but both of them are cute and Peyton is funny, too. #
• 13:58 I'm not missing the mall today, Nick! #
• 14:38 Great. The Bitch is getting out of her funk and going with us to the Mall. Boo! #
• 14:45 and now my little brother is going to play the viola for me and he ain't too bad. #
• 15:01 since when are Crocs appropriate mall attire? SINCE WHEN? #
• 15:32 What is my brother's obsession with walgreen's? #
• 15:53 I am at the mall and NOT shopping. Instead we are fighting in the food court. #
• 16:08 Omg banana cream pie blizzards at dairy queen FTW #
• 17:25 And peace lasted 20 minutes and now we are back to being shitty. #
• 17:52 30 minute wait at olive garden. Yuck #
• 18:12 There is a decided lack of hot guys in the midwest. I need to be back in dallas. #
• 19:48 Good lord. I just ate a ton of food. #
• 20:15 @queenthesixth I do not understand Crocs. They are ugly. #

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Ok - I was holding out on this twitter thing but it's like my new favorite thing.  I think I'm gonna twitter a lot more!  I'm stephentrendy there, too.  So follow me bitches!  PLEASE! 

Ok, I have to apologize. I had rather hoped that people would see the date stamp yesterday and think that it was a joke. The title roughly translates to "the spanish prank", but I suppose, upon further investigation that it does actually work as a believable post. I should have put in a joke or two to tip people off that it was a fake. And also, I went to bed and forgot to update that it was an April Fool's Day prank. So, sorry folks. I'm not going to Spain anytime soon.

Although I have been getting my shit together so that I can get my ESL cert and go to Spain. It'll just be a few more years before that happens. So, don't go thinking I WON'T go to Spain. Just not this month. Or anytime in the next year.

Sorry I pranked you! I just didn't think anyone would actually believe that I would move across the ocean and NOT talk about it here. Or with anyone. Ever. So, again. Sorry. And that comes off as insincere, but it's not. I really am sorry to have pranked you (though I'm a little disappointed that no one got it).

Ok, so today was FULL of good news. First, work was blah, but I got to actually take my full hour lunch. Then, I came home and my visa came through. I'm cleared to go to Spain! EEEEEEEE!

Some background: Last year, I signed up for this ESL certification class. I never posted about it because y'all know I'm not all about the deep entries and it was mainly about getting together an actual career instead of manipulating Excel spreadsheets all day. Well, I got my certification and applied for a school in Madrid. I was kind of worried that they wouldn't take me because I'm 22 (I'll be 23 by the time I get there) and it was the end of the semester. But they said that a lot of the students would be taking an English class over the summer, so it's not a problem at all (and most of the teachers like to go home for the summer). They sent me the course syllabus last week and it's looking really easy.

I already have a place to live and everything (it's with some of the other teachers from abroad). I have to leave puppy behind, but my mom is going to watch him while I'm gone for the next year or two. I wish I didn't have to break my lease, but it was either break it now, or put everything in storage for the 2 months before the Fall semester starts (my lease runs out at the end of July). But the apartments were very understanding and even wished me luck!

I leave at the end of April. I'm seriously so excited. Time to go start re-learning Spanish. It's been awhile since I've used it (besides talking shit about people at work).

Tapas and sangria here I come! YAY!

Ok...LJ friends cut. I just took off people who no longer update or who haven't commented in awhile (actually both) or who I know are no longer active journal people. So no worries, most of you. I think I only cut like 4 friends, 2 of whom were the same person with 2 journals...so no worries.

PS-If you were cut, I won't hesitate to add back. Just drop me a line.

Omg. I just got my refund deposited in my bank account and it's taking every ounce of strength and willpower in my body NOT to spend the whole damn thing on STUPID shit that I don't NEED.

FUCKING A.

That is all.

I want to do this all the time at the mall. LOVE IT.

From Wikipedia (1st sentence under Personal Life header):



Just figured I'd preserve that for posterity. =)

Stolen from spidey

ETA: Sorry; totally forgot to cut that to spare your flist!

( Read more... )

Ok, so I just got back from the DUMBEST, LONGEST, STUPIDEST 4 hours of work that I've ever dealt with in my whole life. 1st, the Cash Management department goes in and has IT create a SQL database for them and put it on the intranet as a nifty application for imaging checks and the like. Only, they built one side of it (check processing) really well. The other side? The logging of the images? Yeah, they didn't think about the server load that 2000 images would create. And then add in the fact that they built it for a user base of 8 people. So obviously the solution is to bring in other departments on Saturday to help with the backlog.

WRONG. They added 10 users to the server's load so it slowed everything down to almost nothing. Then, when any of us finally got through to see 1 check (it took almost 2 hours), the image didn't appear because the server was overloaded. And, I should also mention that the database was set up to expire user sessions after 1 hour. So basically, I sat around for 4 hours doing nothing. Got paid for it. But still. That's 4 hours of my life I'm not going to get back. I have too much to do around the house to just sit around on my ass for 4 hours at a desk I already spent 45-50 hours a week at anyway. STUPID. And then, instead of telling us to go home, once they realized the problem, they waited until the 4 hours were almost up. Sons of bitches.

Ok. Done ranting. Gotta start watching my stories and cleaning and doing laundry. Yay! (Surprisingly, I actually love doing laundry).

So, last night was fun. Out to dinner and then a little jaunt through Wal-Mart (and can I just say, why is it SO hard to find the most recent copy of Vogue at Wal-Mart? And what Wal-Mart doesn't have Soap Opera Digest? I had to settle for Soap Opera Weekly). Also, Vogue had a pretty good letter from the editor on Hilary Clinton refusing to be in the mag until after the election process in order to not be seen as girly. I love Hils, but come on, it's the cover of Vogue! And then Ms Wintour hilariously shows like 8 outfits from couture collections that Hils would NEVER be caught dead in. Funny stuff. Though I do agree with Ms Wintour, Hilary, in that it's been awhile since Margaret Thatcher had to resort to the blue power suit. Please use more colors, Senator Clinton.

And it was payday! And casual day at work! And yay! That's all I have. Tonight, I have dinner with the rents and then grocery shopping.

I did give the dog a bath today (he smelled like garbage and now, post-bath, he smells like vanilla oatmeal).

In other words..a very boring weekend.

Too damn cold. I guess there's supposed to be some sort of "winter storm" tonight that will freeze everything tomorrow. Of course, if some remote part of the country is having nice weather, my company will stay open. But tough cheese for them if the buses don't run tomorrow. Because my ass will stay home if there is no bus.

So, because it's so cold, I made some cinnamon rolls for dessert. Delicious.

And I gave puppy a rawhide chew, which he is currently, well, chewing.

And EEEEEEEEE! Tomorrow is payday!

Which old witch you ask? My evil bitch co-worker. The one who used to be our team leader (unofficially...she was supposed to be promoted but couldn't handle the pressure (of which there was NONE)). Anyway, she didn't really die. She's just on a leave of absence for like 3 weeks. But still. Wonderful. Because we don't have to deal with her. On the other hand it's fucking tax season, which means that we have 2x the work to do and we're down 2 people from this time last year. Lovely. I expect some massive paychecks.

And now, Pizza and TV and then glorious sleep. And maybe some cinnamon rolls, also (I feel like having dessert tonight).

Yeah, it's actually fucking cold. 23 degrees (and I know a great deal of my flist are Yankees and that that is not that cold compared to some temps y'all get...but STFU, that's cold). That wasn't so bad except for puppy deciding to play instead of going potty and letting me get back inside. Lil shit.

Work is still going good. Sort of. I spent a lot of today doing Lee's job as he was out today (he has to take vacation days on days when I have a light workload due to the nature of HIS workload). And I have to tell you. Never have I seen an Excel Workbook with NO FORMULAS. NONE. Might as well write it all down in Word, for god's sake. So, I went through and did some formulas (nothing he couldn't handle...it's not like I did nested IFs in every other column). I'm waiting for the next time he's out to see if he keeps all the formulas or just drops back to straight data entry (and see, his report is due at 10:30 everyday and he pushes that deadline everyday, and then I did the report this morning and had it out to everyone by 9am (and I didn't even have to do much formula work on that part of the report, really, so something's going on with that one).

Still, I have a job. And a FAT paycheck coming (Overtime pay, plus a $250 referral fee for getting a friend a job in FBRM). LOVERLY! Everything's coming up Milhouse Stephen!